Search - Totem on DVD

K. K. (GAMER)
Reviewed on 7/21/2021...

This is not Charles Band and Full Moon Entertainment at their finest hour. I thought it would be like Puppet Master but I was sure wrong. Avoid this unless you are a fan of Band, Full Moon and crap direct to video movies.

Bad Puppets and Plot

Joshua Koppel | Chicago, IL United States | 02/07/2005

(1 out of 5 stars)

"This Full Moon film is pretty lame. For a while you had an idea what to expect from Full Moon but this one is definitely below par for them.

Six young people are mysteriously drawn to an old farmhouse. The first five determine that they can not leave. But once the sixth arrives they can traipse off to a hidden cemetery. There they find a strange statue of three strange creatures. For some reason they all think it looks like a totem pole and not three boxes stacked up.

As the story unfolds, they discover that half of them are supposed to kill the other half. Each death will animate one of the creatures. That is unless they can find a way to thwart the powers controlling them.

The people in the film are like any other group of teens, except they act decidedly urban although they are supposedly from the surrounding countryside. The tallest has a European accent but is obviously Native American (obvious to the other characters, that is). He can understand ancient dialects. The creatures barely move and are some of the worst effects I have seen in ages. The ending is abrupt and poorly explained. The DVD itself is bare bones. The menu has two option, Play and Trailers (5 movies including Totem). This is definitely the worst movie I have seen from Full Moon and those who missed it didn't miss anything."

The only way to describe this movie.....

Johny Bottom | Jacksonville, NC | 12/28/2004

(1 out of 5 stars)

"...is that it flat out sucks. I mean I love bad B rated movies, but this is not one of those so bad it's good, or so bad it's entertaining, this movie is so bad it sucks sucks sucks.

The acting is atrocious even on this level. The directing was awful. The camera angles and shots for the little demons was so bad that the little buggers got boring every time they were on the screen. You just wait for this movie to be over and if you make it to the end, well you basiclly accomplished wasting your time. You can't even tell your friends you watched this the whole way through, because they've never heard of it. If they have heard of it, they'll think you're too lazy to shut off the TV.

The gist of it in a nutshell is this. Six strangers are summoned to a cabin in the middle of nowhere. There is an 'invisible force wall' keeping them within the grounds of the cabin. They discover a graveyard with a granite totem pole with three ugly and incredibly stupid looking imps. There is an Indian among the six that knows nothing about Indians, but yet he can translate the mumbling of a girl who got a hatchette to the chest. Follow me on this, you just have to watch it.

So three must be a killer and three must be a victim. Over and over and over again we are told that the totem devils control their movements. So a guy kills a girl, then a girl kills a guy, this leaves the Indian dude and the best looking of the three females. The killers are dragged out of the cabin by demons.

The anti-climax is stupid and if you've made it this far, you are bored to tears by now and are praying for the ending. So the victims now kill their killers and the Indian dude doesn't kill the chick he was supposed to kill.

Not the zombies coming out of the ground. Aren't you supposed to bury someone six feet deep? The demons rise out of six inches of dirt. They have no purpose in the story, but then again you really won't care.

This movie is a waste of time, effort, and should never have existed. I will never see this again no matter what and I hope this has warned enough people to do something constructive with an hour and 15 minutes instead of watching this.

Once again I just have to say, this sucks."

I Enjoyed This Movie!!

Jill Dunsmore | 01/05/2008

(3 out of 5 stars)

"I had a feeling Totem was going to be bad. However, I still gave it a try, assuming that there would be some good parts. And I was right.

Totem is FAR from a good movie, but it wasn't just a bunch of bullcrap warped into a full-length movie. It had it's parts, the acting was pretty bearable for a movie nobody's ever heard of, and the plot was very weird and mysterious. But, the puppets were just awful!! Whenever the puppet would come on screen, it would get all strobe light-like, and it would be hard to see it.

The ending was very sudden, but it explained everything pretty well. It was a bit weird though, but you could easily understand what was going on.

In retrospect, Totem was a pretty entertaining movie that is definitely worth a try!"