With no blood, gore, or nudity, this film exists only to be
Daniel Jolley | Shelby, North Carolina USA | 08/19/2006
(2 out of 5 stars)
"Imagine, if you will, a low-budget horror film with a vampire called Moondoggie (which is so much easier to say that Count Eric von Zipper), a vampire-hunter called the Big Kahuna, almost no blood whatsoever, a soundtrack of we-can't-actually-pay-you quality, and barely enough plot to hold 99 minutes of low-quality video together. By all means, throw Carmen Electra in there, but you're still left with one of the worst vampire films ever made. For the love of Dracula, there's not even any nudity in this film. Carmen's hot - there's no doubt about that - but she doesn't exactly get a lot of camera time in this stinker, and you can see plenty more of her in a wide selection of magazine pictorials than you'll ever get to gawk at here (on an even more deflating note, she has a body double in this film - now, I ask you, why on earth would Carmen Electra ever need a body double?). Who made this film, anyway? The whole point of making an atrocious horror film is to get some attractive women naked. I thought everyone knew that.
So here's the story. For some insane reason, the parents of Frankie (Trevor Lissauer) leave him home alone all summer while they tour Europe, seemingly unaware that a teenager with a best friend named Bogie (Danny Hitt) cannot possibly be trustworthy. A mere one day later, Frankie finds himself hosting Moondoggie, a stranger he and Bogie met on the beach, his babe-alicious friends Katrina (Debra Xavier) and Sulka (Carmen Electra), and Frankie's disgusting lackey Bruno (Sydney Lassick) in his home. These increasingly unwelcome guests basically take over the whole house. Despite the fact that lost pet notices seem to appear outside right after each of Bruno's amazingly bloody meals, trash bags are used to cover all of the windows, weird little knick-knacks like Satanic crosses start popping up, and three coffins suddenly appear in his parent's bedroom, it takes Frankie a while to figure out that he may in fact be suffering from a vampire infestation. With Bogie incapable of seeing anything wrong with Moondoggie and his hot little vampirettes, Frankie has only one option - to seek the help of Dr. Van Helsingmeister (Adam West), better known as the Big Kahuna, a surfer dude trying to live up to his family name.
Were it not for the presence of Carmen Electra in this film, it would have already fallen into the trash pit of putrid cinema (it was originally released in 1997 as An American Vampire Story). It's not even bad in a funny way - it's just bad, period. As long as there are bargain bins, though, there will be guys like me who see Carmen Electra adorning a DVD cover and decide to give the film a chance. Just be forewarned: the plot is really weak, the acting is below average (including that of Adam West, who is no stranger to thoroughly awful films), the special effects - which are few and far between - are amateurish at best, the filmmakers obviously had a restraining order thrown on logic before shooting began, and the list just goes on. The only people who should subject themselves to American Vampire are those of us obsessed with watching as many bad horror films as we can get our hands on."
I Laughed So Hard Tears Started Rolling!
Happy Camper | Baltimore, Maryland USA | 08/20/2006
(5 out of 5 stars)
"This is absolutlely the most humorous vampire movie you will ever see! It's deliberately campy, but doesn't go overboard! The acting, overall, is surprisingly good! Even Adam West looks great!
I enjoyed the premise of the story where a bunch of beach bum vampires need a place to stay for the summer! Another amusing aspect of this hilarious tale is when the main characters's hormones start to surge because his girlfriend now wants to spend the summer "with him alone!" But he can't do so with a bunch of partying vampires hanging around the house! Before this quandry, he just accepted the fact the beach bums were here to stay. Now, with his hormones surging, he gets the courage-up to give those pushy vamps the boot!
If you have a good sense of humor for the ironic, and absurd, you will definitely enjoy this unusual film!"
Stephanie P. | 02/26/2007
(4 out of 5 stars)
"This movie should be watched as a comedy. First of all, I purchased this movie at the dollar store. Second, the characters have names such as Nacho, MoonDoggie and the Big Kahuna. Third, the vampires have cheesy lines like "Your neck looks so...jugular." Fourth, cheesy and inconsistent props, graphics, scenery, etc. In one scene it is night outside the front door and day outside the back door! This movie is incredible! The only reason I didn't give the movie a five-star rating is because of the dog-exploding-in-the-microwave scene! Don't worry. I didn't give anything away because the dog scene has nothing to do with the plot (if there is one). With that said if you watch the movie as anything other than a comedy you will be VERY disapointed.