The security chief for the alien Psychlos, who have conquered the Earth, decides to use human slaves to mine for gold, but a young man decides to challenge Psychlos domination. — Genre: Science Fiction — Rating: PG13 — Releas... more »e Date: 16-JUL-2002
A perfection addition to the bad Mystery Science Theater movie collection due to some bad elements. I have always thought this was really bad but watched again and it actually had some parts of it that were entertaining. What dragged it down was horrible acting and accent by John Travola and an unbelievable plotline during parts of the movies. A must for campy mystery science movies!
0 of 1 member(s) found this review helpful.
Keith A. (Keefer522) Reviewed on 5/23/2013...
I'm still not sure how John Travolta's career managed to survive this debacle. The script makes no sense, the acting is mostly terrible and overall it feels like a cheap SyFy Channel movie pumped up on steroids.
2 of 4 member(s) found this review helpful.
Chad B. (abrnt1) from CABERY, IL Reviewed on 2/22/2012...
John Travolta pushed this film through production. It's based on one of the bad pulp sci-fi novels of the founder of Travolta's religion (scientology) and is hideous beyond belief. A badly made cinematic train wreck.
2 of 4 member(s) found this review helpful.
Ross B. from MEGGETT, SC Reviewed on 5/25/2010...
This is a poorly acted movie-the good guys are simply wood! Forest and John overact a lot, and the weird dialoge and opinions of the bad guys are what makes this a great "anti-film"-it's so bad, it's good! I recommend it, but only for the weirdness and cool fx/audio, and certainly not the plot! Proceed with caution....
3 of 5 member(s) found this review helpful.
Harry E. (HHHarry) from BALTIMORE, MD Reviewed on 3/17/2010...
Oh man. What a stinker.
The acting was awful. Yeah I am looking at you Travolta and Whittaker. They are lucky this film didn't destroy their careers. And it may have crippled Barry Pepper's career.
The plot was less than mindless, if that is even possible. And the effects were pretty bad as well. I don't know where all the money this film costs went. Maybe on platform shoes for Travolta and Whittaker...
Avoid this thing at all costs.
The only reason to watch this film is to invite over some friends, pass around a few beers and MST3K the heck out of it...
You have been warned!!!!!
5 of 7 member(s) found this review helpful.
Lisa R. from WINNSBORO, TX Reviewed on 9/30/2009...
1 of 4 member(s) found this review helpful.
Brandon R. (Tizank12) from CINCINNATI, OH Reviewed on 7/7/2009...
Very shaky film, If you are s scifi buff this movie is for you
2 of 7 member(s) found this review helpful.
Leendert S. (qrazydutch) from OAK HARBOR, WA Reviewed on 3/10/2009...
Sort of shake, rattle and roll in a funny sort of way, but OK if you like SCIence Fiction
2 of 5 member(s) found this review helpful.
Vernon P. (Merlin) Reviewed on 4/25/2008...
This project was flawed from the beginning. It was always conceived as a big-screen movie. In fact, John Travolta pushed hard for that.
There was only one major problem, and John (as a Scientologist) should have known it at the start. My paperback copy of the book runs 1066 pages. There is no way to do justice to such a large book in a 2 hour movie. If this had been done (using the entire book, not just the center 1/3rd of it) as a 4-6 part mini-series on TV, with the same make-up, sets, cast, and special effects, it would have probably been one of the best movies of the year.
It's a shame Travolta put his ego ahead of the quality of the project. This was a bomb, and it didn't need to be.
6 of 7 member(s) found this review helpful.
Jeff V. (burielofmel) from HARRIMAN, TN Reviewed on 3/13/2008...
Oh man. Hahahaha.
If you bought this movie, I'm sorry for you.
10 of 14 member(s) found this review helpful.
You want plot holes? Here you go.
messiah13 | New York, NY | 05/20/2000
(1 out of 5 stars)
"#1 Johnny Goodboy used a Psychlo learning machine, and learned "Euclidean" Geometry. I guess the psychlos were fans of the ancient Greeks.#2 The tribes lived in caves in Denver for 1000 years, but one spoke with a heavy British accent.#3 They had no system of writing any more, but after using the learning machine that taught him Pyschlo, Johnny knew how to read English#4 It took the psychlos 9 minutes to defeat the combined armies, navies, air force, marines of the USA, China, Russia, and England etc... but it took 9 minutes for a dozen cavemen to defeat them?#5 If the psychlos were so smart that they had a learning machine, then how come they couldn't learn English, but needed to teach Johnnie their language? Also, the ancient teacher from another alien race spoke to Johnnie in English.#6 The Styrofoam creatures at the mini golf place looked mighty nice after 1000 years. I guess styrofoam really doesn't biodegrade.#7 The Psychlos have advance mapping capabilities that allowed them to detect a tiny bit of gold from a earthquake in the rocky mountains, but they couldn't find Ft. Knox in 1000 years. It took cavemen a few days to figure that out.#8 The library of congress is topped with the capitol dome.#9 The Psychlos fought a war, albeit a short one with humans with aircraft, yet thought dogs were smart and humans were unable to operate mining equipment.#10 The Pyschlos taught the most rebellious human to use their flying equipment, which is dumb in and of itself. How did they beat us in the first place? But then, he sneaks off in the craft for a week, cruising to Ft. Knox, Washington D.C., and Ft. Hood, Texas, and they don't notice it or track it with radar.#11 In Ft. Hood Texas, the rebels arrive 1000 years after humanity was decimated, to find that the power was still on. I guess the military paid their electrical bills way in advance. Not only was the power on, but there were harrier jets with full gas tanks, missiles, and a flight simulator that was still functioning and turned on when they arrived. Oh, and there was a nuclear bomb left out in the open for them to grab too. How convenient.#12 The rebels, aside from Johnny did not get the learning machine experience, but he was able to train them to read English in seven days. He got them enough training time each in the flight simulator for them to learn battle tactics and to fly advanced military aircraft to beat the evil aliens in battle. Let's see. 10's of thousands of air force personnel who trained for years and years were vanquished by the Psychlos, but 3 dozen hillbillies with a week of training in English, battle tactics, and flying were able to destroy them without breaking a sweat.#13 When Johnny is shot with a pyschlo radar gun, he goes through 5 or 6 plate glass windows without getting a cut.#14 The night they defeat the aliens, Johnnie's hair is all thrashed around and going this way and that, after a hard night of battle, he emerges with clean hair that is nicely braided in front.#15 The books in the Denver library were still very readable after 1000 years of exposure to atmosphere.#16 The buildings still had glass in the windows 1000 years later.#17 Cars were slightly rusted, but still had their original paint job from 1000 years ago.#18 Cars still had air pressure in their tires after a millenium of disuse.#19 The nuclear bomb had no casing, but the rebels didn't show signs of exposure.#20 The humans instead of mining the gold, got bars of it from Ft. Knox. I was surprised that John Travolta's character noticed, but Johnny said that they melted it down into bars for them. Yeah, from what foundry near by?#21 Johnny was tortured by the Psychlos, testing if he could survive for 4 minutes without oxygen which they didn't breathe. He runs through the place, and there are several fires burning despite the lack of oxygen. I guess the laws of chemistry are suspended in the 31st century.So...the guy who said the film had no plot holes apparently possesses quite a few holes in his own thinking. This is not the kind of stuff on which you base suspension of disbelief - this is inexcusable tripe from talentless filmmakers (and a hack scifi writer who was the laughing stock of his generation) aiming only to cash in on the success of numerous superior films. And since when is scifi poorly received in the press? Movies like "The Matrix," "Star Wars," and "Pitch Black" all received well-deserved accolades. The reviews for "Battlefield Earth" have been resoundingly negative not due to any religious bias but due to the simple fact that it's an ineptly filmed, poorly acted, incoherent, derivative attempt to milk genre fans of their money. But, judging from the dismal box office receipts, it's nice to see that the proposed sequel will probably never happen. Thank God.Now go watch some real scifi flicks, and hey, go read some books by Heinlein, Campbell, or Bradbury, a group of writers who each possessed more talent in their pinky fingers than L. Ron Hubbard exhibited through a career propelled by some of the worst prose ever produced. Scientologist or not, the guy just plain sucked."
Big Budget 'Plan 9' Remake!!!
Roule Duke | the Green Inferno | 10/24/2003
(1 out of 5 stars)
"For starters, every single terrible thing you have heard about this film is 100% true! And while that may be bad for Scientology cult disciples and any other half wit who invested money in the films production, it's brilliant for lovers of so bad they're good flicks.The plot/plot holes: It's 1000 years into the future and earth is over run by an invading 9-foot tall alien race called 'Psychlos' (umm? 'psychos' and don't expect the difference in height to be as well filmed as in the LOTR trilogy, psychlos are created by having 'actors' stumble around in shoulder pads on obvious platform shoes), man-animalkind is made up of slaves and other living like cavemen in tattered clothes (not bad wear considering their clothing should be 1000 years old plotwise), man-animal Barry Pepper ventures out to be captured and enslaved. Cut to scenes of ridiculous alien banter about 'leverage' and of them double crossing each other (how did such an unorganized race take over the world in 9 minutes?!), scheming psychlo Travolta wants to secretly mine gold (aliens value gold too?) in a zone aliens can't go (alien air reacts badly to radiation?) so he expands Pepper's mind by a laser light show and teaches him to fly?! (it's not enough that they leave the slaves working unsupervised and not under guard around control panels but they have to teach one to read psychlo and fill his head with useful info). Born again scientologist Pepper (after his education he starts spouting Hubbard's mantras like "maths in the universal language") doesn't really mine but merely picks up gold from fort Knox (after 1000 years of alien occupation they still haven't found the gold at Fort Knox?) of course psychlo Travolta not only believes that half a dozen man animals mined a few cubic meters of gold in 14 days but they also melted in down to perfect bars in their spare time? Given 7 more days to mine Pepper and fellow man-animals hatch a plan to liberate the planet using guns and planes (which are of course in perfect working order after 1000 years), man-animals learn to fly the jets (in 7 days flat using 1000 year old flight simulators which still have electricity). Of course the alien aircraft which took over the world in 9 minutes are no match for cavemen in jump-jets (but then again these cgi jump-jets are capable of hovering in hollow building and making hairpin turns!?). They then destroy planet psychlo by beaming up a nuclear bomb. Many scientology activists will plead with you to believe that the book isn't as bad as the movie, but my little bro read it and yes it contains all of the basic plot holes and stupidity of the film and them some.The 'director' of this film (about now he's probably flipping burgers or cleaning toilets) tried to make the film stylish with countless jump cuts and other slick editing but that just deepens the cheesyness. Its pure hilarity too when they try to steal from other flicks: planet psychlo looks like the opening of 'Blade Runner' and also the running through glass scene from BR is repeated here too (Barry Bob Pepper however emerges from this feat without any lacerations!?), a speech reminiscent of 'BraveHeart' about "freedom" is given at one point by Pepper too (made even funnier by the fact that a man-animal in blue facepaint is in the background). And the idiotic screen wipes which are used! Obviously an attempt to emulate the good 'StarWars' movies (the original ones) they use doubledoor opening screens wipes in EVERY single scene transition! When the last scene cuts to the credits and they use a double door closing screen wipe, I was laughing so hard it hurt!The fact that this is a big budget film means that you get to see a-list actors making fools of themselves on screen. Real life scientology cult member John Travolta, who you may remember from the period-costume drama 'Saturday Night Fever', puts in the single greatest comedy performance in film history! He reads ever single inept line of dialogue like it was pure Shakespeare in a dead serious manner that comes across as pure camp genius. Genuinely good actor Pepper is shamed too but not so much by his performance but by a script that had him making ape noises in a standoff! If only they had of cast true scientology fanatic and non-actor Tom Cruise in Pepper's role and spared Barry the embarrassment, I'm sure the film would have got even worse (if that?s possible?).While I only gave this film 1 star for pure comedy viewing this film definitely earns 5 stars! During the entire 2 hour running time you will be in a state of constant laughter, more so than can be generated by any comedy movie put out in the last 10 years. In fact there is something almost surreal about viewing 'Battlefield Earth' in that unlike any other so bad its good movies this one was made on an enormous Hollywood budget. While all big budget flicks made in Hollywood are bad by default, none come close to the virtuoso ludicrous insanity that is 'Battlefield Earth'!While it is good for a hearty laugh and satisfying to see what should be a triumph for scientologists go down in history as one of the most absurd film blunders of all time (LOL not mention the substantial fanatical losses inflicted on all parties involved), I can't help feel bad that the money that went into production of this trainwreck of a film could have gone a long way in fighting cancer or world hunger or any other worthy cause."
A completely ludicrous film
qmlhcb | Michigan | 08/06/2002
(1 out of 5 stars)
"When you sit down to see a movie, you know suspension of disbelief is a must. Especially when the film is a science fiction. You know a lot of things in the movie can't really happen, but you can let yourself believe you can for those two hours you're immersed in another world. Unless, of course, the movie is too ludicrous and everything that happens screams disbelief. Battlefield Earth has enough unbelievable situations for three terrible movies. (Warning, minor spoilers ahead).The premise of the film asks you to accept that a supreme alien race conquered Earth in 9 minutes, and then for 1,000 years have reaped the land for natural resources, namely gold. So a civilization so advanced it can take control of a planet so quickly, hasn't found all the gold on Earth yet? And hasn't even found Fort Knox yet? And they don't have a clue that humans are intelligent enough to operate mining equipment (They laugh at the thought of humans being able to do any work), yet they live in the ruins of Denver, surrounded by obvious signs of an intelligent race which they enslaved. At one point in the film, even, these humans, who have been forced to live in caves or cages, find an army base filled with still working planes and weapons, and learn how to operate everything as good as any experienced pilot or soldier, in only a few days. I could go on; these are just the tip of the iceberg.Besides the ridiculous leaps of belief the movie asks you to make, there is more to despise here. For example, the pacing is atrocious. In the first 5 minutes of the movie, you meet Jonnie (Barry Pepper) as he returns to his home tribe, says a few words to the woman we're told he's romantically involved with, gets in a fight with the head of the tribe about how they should venture out of their caves, and leaves. The film doesn't show us how they live, explore their culture, examine the relationship Jonnie has neither with the head of the tribe nor with his girlfriend, or even give Jonnie any in depth characterization. Instead, the whole movie moves so fast, we don't know these characters any better then the extras without any speaking lines.However, there are a few things to admire in this film. Primarily, there are some beautiful scenery shots of mountains, fields, and cities overgrown and taken back by the wilds. There are even a few good ideas peppered throughout the film. Just don't blink, you might miss them.If you're not at all fussy about intelligent (or even somewhat believable) science fiction, or character development, or even acting (a can of worms I didn't open, John Travolta is terrible as the bad alien Terl), then Battlefield Earth might be worth a quick glance. Otherwise stay away. Stay far, far away."
"Battlefield Earth" drinking games!
Richard Goddard | Hillsborough, NJ | 01/05/2005
(2 out of 5 stars)
Finally, a "Plan 9 from outer space" for our own generation. One simply cannot derive greater campy fun from this film, which has spawned a thousand drinking games! Here are some of my favorites:
***** LEVERAGED DOUBLE-WORD DRINKY-DRINK ***** Take a swig whenever someone says one of those silly hyphenated nouns (e.g. man-animal, crap-lousy), Double-swig whenever you hear the word "Leverage"
***** LOGIC-LAPSE QUAFF-FEST ***** Take a drink whenever confronted with a point in the plot that makes no sense whatsoever - e.g.
- that this group of savage men can learn to fly fighter jets in a day or two; well, OK, I can suspend disbelief for that, but...
- that the aforementioned jets can operate after 1000+ years of sitting idle
- the part where Johnny Goodboy (LOL) is running around without air for, say, 15 minutes
- that the Psychlos call themselves "Psychlos" but call these humans from Earth "man-animals"
- when the "man-animals" are sent to go mine gold, none of these super-smart Psychlos notice that they've apparently mined perfectly smelted gold bars
- when Johnny goes into the library, he peruses 1000+ year old books with fully intact covers and pages; they simply just need a bit of dusting
- that these super-intelligent and strong Psychlos, who conquered Earth in 9 (Yes, 9!) minutes, can barely walk in their silly "Kiss" hand-me down boots and can hardly grasp anything with their big floppy rubber gloves
- while observing the stranded man-animals catching rats to eat, the Psychlos assume rats must be their favorite food, even though there were no other edibles to catch
***** SILLY-QUOTE CHUG-A-LUG *****
Take a sip whenever confronted with nuggets of wisdom such as these:
"I am going to make you as happy as a baby Psychlo on a straight diet of kerbango."
"It will go straight to the home office!"
*For the hardcore kerbango-fan, while drinking, tilt your body at a 30-degree angle for no apparent reason, just like the cinematographer did with the camera!"
The funniest comedy EVER!!!
rodney23 | 10/01/2001
(5 out of 5 stars)
"Let us, gentle reader, ignore this films failure as a sci-fi / religious movie and let us celebrate its triumph as the greatest comedy of all time.Imagine, for a moment that Jerry Falwel decides to make a film based the book of Job. Jerry casts himself as Job (in KISS make-up) then casts Adam West as the voice of God and the Olsen Twins as Satan. Add a soundtrack by The Bloodhound Gang featuring Cher and you begin to get a small idea of the unintentional hilarity that is Battlefield Earth.I had a few friends over to watch this and we had a blast (the alcohol helped...alot). Our favorite part was when former Sweat Hog John Travolta as the platform-boot wearing Terl hands over a machine gun to the hero (and I'm using that word in its broadest possible sense) Johnnie. Johnnie hands the gun BACK to Terl and then spends the rest of the movie trying to get his hands on MORE guns. "Whattcha gonna do with those", we screamed at the TV "hand 'em over?"And don't even get me started on the "Human-animals like to eat rats" part. Once in every generation a film this bad comes along - let us be thankful that we're here to enjoy it."