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Inaccuracy Compounded With Inanity

G. L. Marshall Jr. | Gurley, AL USA | 03/10/2006

(1 out of 5 stars)

"This account of Marco Polo abounds in inaccuracies and totally unbelieveable characters andd dialogue, comical even by cinematic standards. The real Marco was about 17 when he went with his father and uncle to travel to China. The Marco (Don Diamont) of this movie is a robust 30-something who travels alone except for his brother Nicolo (Jeff Saumier) and occasional nonentities he picks up as he goes. The banalites are too numerous to mention; you have to see to see this loser to believe it. But I'll mention a few: the countryside, whether in Italy, Greece, Outremer, or Armenia always looks suspiciously the same, much like a verdant rural Europe--the dialogue is too modern and overly cliched: no way they talked like that in Marco's time--Marco is a one-man army and karate practicioner:again, the bounds of credibility are sorely stretched--the inhabitants of Acre and Armenia are for the most part fair-haired and light-complexioned: hmmmmm... -- the "Templars" including the Grand Master, no less, drop everything to help Marco and his friends escape to Armenia. Not only that, but they invade Armenia later to rescue Marco and friends from the evil clutches of Beelzebub (Jack Palance). I always thought the Saracens had pretty well wiped out the Templars by Marco's time in Outremer; in any event, there is no way such a small band could have survived a ride from Acre to Armenia; let alone an invasion of Armenia--The Armenians look more like Hagar the Horrible vikings than Armenian soldiers--the Armenian princess and her lady in waiting look and talk very English--the fights, Beelzebub's "gauntlet" and escape scenes are puerile and unconvincing--I could go on, but why bother? Mercifully, this junkfest ends with the rescue of the princess and death of Beelzebub in Armenia. I doubt anyone could stand a continuation of this plotless idiocy all the way to China. Poor Jack Palance--he must have needed the money pretty badly to sign on to this piece of undistinguished tripe. Historically, histrionically, and cinematically this dog is a loser and should be condemned to the flame and cast out of the mind."