Only If You Have to Have the Stars
Jeremy | US | 02/02/2000
(1 out of 5 stars)
"This dvd would be an okay runthrough of 60's drek if not for the jerky editing and the bleeped words. The film was apparently obtained from a tv distribution company which has bleeped out some of the words for a tv showing. It may not bother all, but I find it maddening. None of the stars is at their best here. In fact, I've never seen John Saxon this bad. I wish more care had been taken with the release--as it is, I keep wanting to pitch my copy out. Simitar has done much, much better elsewhere."
Deserves zero stars.
LF | 05/28/2001
(1 out of 5 stars)
"What a ... I wish I had read reviews about the DVD first. I just purchased this ... in a 2-pack for one dollar at Sam Goody (the second was a Jeff Fahey flick...don't ask). That means this film cost me 50 cents and I still got taken. First of all, warning about 2-pack DVD's marked "Value Priced Action Movies." Mine came wrapped in a carboard sleeve so you couldn't see the actual DVD cases. My DVD case for THE SWISS CONSPIRACY was a "second" with the title missing from the front and a thumbnail of the cover superimposed where it shouldn't have been. Instead of rejecting and replacing the sleeve (or DVD) they just repackaged it in a two-pack with a cardboard cover! For fifty cents I thought I could at least frame the sleeve like a mini-poster and use the disc as a frisbee, but nooooooo........even the disc broke after I flung it onto the freeway. Regarding the dreck within....it was edited for TV!! Repeat...edited for TV you ... ... What ... is wrong with Simitar, those major ... I've seen that once before with a film called THE KINGFISHER CAPER and now here we go again ... ..."
Irrelevant obligatory dull sex scene
LF | USA | 01/08/2006
(2 out of 5 stars)
"This film holds your interest on a low level, on "simmer", not on "cook". It's not awful. It's not very good either. My wife picks up these movies that are two for a dollar, figuring what the hell. And I watch them. She doesn't.
It is one of those really hokey plots. Some sort of scheme to rip off a Swiss bank by pretending that their security was blown. Blackmail. Phony blackmail. Nobody's security was blown. There is no way of knowing anything about those Swiss bank accounts.
The part that really made me laugh, in fact the only good laugh in the movie, was when David Janssen had sex with one of the female characters. It was so irrelevant to the plot. It was just put in there because sex is part of the formula, so put some in there, however irrelevant.
And of course they don't show the sex. They show the two of them in bed, but there's nothing even R rated going on. It's all a lot of stupid nothing. It is absurd to feel that such an empty sex scene adds something to the story. It's just a base that they feel they have to touch. Throw some sex in, but don't show anything of interest.
Maybe the people involved with the production of this film should be punished for making such a dumb film."