To say it is Bert I.'s finest film would be faint praise.
Doghouse King | Omaha, NE United States | 09/09/2002
(5 out of 5 stars)
"This was, at the time of its release, no less than the crowning achievement of man. So it should not dim the glory of Village of the Giants one bit that a mere 4 years later, Armstrong's moonwalk eclipsed this film's importance to humanity. The fact remains that Village of the Giants represents a watershed moment in our history.It is, and you can believe me, because I am a believable guy, the BEST BAD MOVIE OF ALL TIME!All the things that make Bert I. Gordon movies what they are are present here, in full- and silly- force. In fact, it is as if all Bert's planets aligned at once, and he found his true calling, moving beyond mere Colossal Beasts and Cyclopean things and giant Spiders, to those most photogenic of glandular mishaps: Giant women! Not to say that there isn't a giant tarantula in this film, or a colossal beast in the whiny form of a young Beau Bridges, but Bert's camera clearly favors the elephantine charms of Joy and Tish (as well as the average-sized pulchritude of Toni) over the evermore passe thrills of mere oversized creatures. Like, giant grasshoppers are SO 1957!Other things contribute to the overall pleasing quality of this film's ineptitude, not the least of which is, despite Bert's recurrent leering, a basically naïve sensibility: movies had not become too dirty or trashy yet. The bad teens are about as menacing as wheelchair-bound octogenarians- they wear cardigans, for goshsakes. And while there is a definite cheesecake factor at play here, it is in the G-rated manner of the Frankie-and-Annie Beach Party films, not the slimy type in evidence in later Hammer horrors.Other bad movies are equally as "bad." Al Adamson, Jerry Warren, Colman Francis, Ed Wood's later stuff, even Bert himself a few years later... all of these guys make lousy films. But they're sleazier somehow- not as *fun.*Fans of the Hideous Sun Demon know well how star Robert Clarke's trousers became soaked with sweat during filming in the hot sun, to the point where it looked as though the Sun Demon couldn't control his bladder. That led to unintentional hilarity for B-lovers.Now imagine several howlingly funny instances like that for every minute of this film's 80-minute run time. Dialogue, plot, effects, music, direction- everything is side-splittingly ...here. There are more laughs in this movie than in Jim Carrey's entire filmography.
And far from being the bewildering, incoherently awful mess that Plan 9 is, this movie is very straightforward; it just does everything in such an over-the-top and utterly wrong fashion.Now, in the manner of the copy on those lovably hyperbolic posters from days gone by, I will outline only a fraction of this movie's treasured moments:
See! Beau Bridges try to pick up a chick by telling her his dad is the biggest man in the meat business!
See! Where John Ratzenberger got his inspiration for Cliff Clavan the mother-dominated postman in Beau's wink-wink nudge-nudge performance!
See! Ronnie Howard create a substance which turns normal things into giants, and act surprised when they leave!
See! Tommy Kirk claim the giant ducks for his own, raising his arms as though he just scored the winning touchdown!
See! The infamous ride of a young cowboy on Joy Harmon's bust!
See! Bert I. Gordon's directorial genius, as shots of the tail feathers of ducks being tortured by gaffers are intercut with shots of boogieing girls' rear ends!
See! Song after song after song after song, each one more hypnotically campy and dated than the last!
See! "Giants" moving very s l o w ly, to signify how totally, you know, HUGE they are!
See! Cops not notice the 30-foot tall teens in technicolor clothing standing ten feet away!
See! Tommy break a fake chair over Beau's skinny, knobby, hairy plaster leg, then listen in incredulity as Beau shouts, "O o o o o o oww!" and pouts!
See! Several scenes of interminable length while the bad "teens" shake it before the camera! See Beau make fine use of the ever-popular dance technique known as 'The White Man's Overbite!'
See! Midgets longing to be giants!
See! Much more wonderful, terrible stuff than I could tell you about if this review were five times this long! This really doesn't even begin to touch how comic the dialogue, or performances, or the direction are!See! Yourself buying this dvd posthaste! Then, buy one for a friend!See! also: Hideous Sun Demon; Dr. Goldfoot and the Bikini Machine; Astounding She-Monster; Jail Bait; Brain From Planet Arous; Phantom Planet; Attack of the Fifty-Foot Woman (1958); Magic Sword!"
Oh the pain...
Echo | Western Hemisphere | 01/25/2002
(4 out of 5 stars)
"A 3:30 movie staple (during the 1970s) finally arrives in DVD! A terrible movie, but fascinating in a car-wreck kind of way.The first thing that comes to mind is the costuming...this movie was made in 1965, but everyone's dressed for the sock hop! One exception is the Beau Brummells, featured as a club band early in the film...one look at these guys and you'll believe that yes, even native Californian's tried to emulate the look and the sound of the Beatles. Great band (and they actually wrote some pretty good music)...but their efforts to look like the Ed Sullivan-ear Fab Four is laughable. Speaking of the club...it's located in the fictional city of Hainesville, California and its called the "Whisky-A-Go-Go". I don't get out much, but my recollection is that the Whisky is on Sunset Boulevard in West Hollywood! It's a great chance to see some early performances by future prominent actors...you'll see the hairiest Beau Bridges you can stand (this movie is Beau-tiful), Ron Howard (looks exactly like Opie to the point of distraction, Tony Basil (yes, that Toni Basil), Tish Sterling (daughter of Ann Sothern), and Tim Rooney (Mickey's son). Someone pointed out to me recently that the giant ducks were controlled by attaching strings to their legs and wings...no way to no for sure except to watch, and sure enough, you can see the strings. Sort of took the fun out of it for me.Watch for one of the most offensive endings ever committed to film. Highly recommended for camp value. If you ever get the chance, see the MST3K treatment of this film."
"I Was Big Before" ~ Oversized Go-Go Dancers Gone Wild
Brian E. Erland | Brea, CA - USA | 06/10/2008
(3 out of 5 stars)
"Synopsis: A group of delinquent teenagers out looking for a good time steal a secret growth formula from a kid genius (Ron Howard) and expand to gigantic proportions. Just for kicks they decide to terrorize the local town folk and dance up a storm until someone can discover a way to shrink them back to size.
Critique: `Village of the Giants' from '65 is one of those films that fall into the often times embarrassing category of guilty pleasures. For lack of a better way to describe the storyline you might say it's a cross between the Frankie and Annette `Beach Party' movies with a heavy dose of the television series `Land of the Giants'.
Yes, this is a pretty bad flick that looks worse now some forty-three years later. It does however have some very well known names in the cast along with the offspring of some other film and television personalities. Personally speaking my attachment to this film was for the inclusion of two lovely young ladies in the cast; Joy Harmon (the girl washing the car in `Cool Hand Luke') and Gail Gilmore. Ah yes.., childhood crushes are difficult to overcome and I definitely had one on these two.
My Rating: Don't expect much and you won't be too disappointed: -3 Stars-."
It took a village to raise these damn idiots
Rottenberg's rotten book review | nyc | 03/21/2001
(4 out of 5 stars)
"Very loose adaption of "Food of the Gods", as if HG Wells had adapted his work for one of those AIP Beach movies. In this one, a group of cardigan wearing bad-teens led by the evil Beau Bridges descend on a California town, not knowing that the town's resident genius (known as "Genius" and played by Ron Howard) has developed something called goo which causes super-growth. A couple of geese try the stuff and grow to a size slightly smaller than a BMW, amusing and amazing the town before ending up as the guests of honor at a BBQ for a town full of kids who can't spell FDA. In a classic scene, the evil Bridges gang steals the goo and, too delinquent to just sell the stuff to the highest bidder, they eat it. Growing to monstrous size (which is anything bigger than their clothes can stand before tearing off - a logical detail actually working for the plot for once), they take over the town and force its citizens to watch them engage in slow motion dancing (how hard did they have to fight for this town). Led by Tommy Kirk, the good teens try to keep the bad teens at bay until Genius can create a "cure" for the goo. At its worst, the flick is bald exploitation, and good clean fun at best. Most critics slam this as an exploitative version of the Wells book - why the connection was ever made is a mystery to me. The problem is that the producers take this stuff much to seriously - if they had Russ Meyer do it (a guy whose pretty honest of his intentions) it would have been a big cult hit."