Subject: I have found a DVD that I think you would enjoy
Hear Raven de la Croix Snort Like A Pig, And Much, Much More
Robert I. Hedges | 09/22/2004
(5 out of 5 stars)
""The Double-D Avenger", starring Kitten Natividad and her enormous talents (in what is the only buxom, geriatric, superhero action-comedy that I am aware of) was the brainchild of Director William Winckler, who made it on a shoestring, and makes you wonder (sometimes out loud) "What was he thinking?" I have seen the original edition, but have recently purchased the version featuring commentary by Joe Bob Briggs, and I recommend that version much more than the originally released version. As a technique, I recommend watching the film with the Joe Bob commentary track off, then again with it on if you do decide to buy the Joe Bob version (and you should.) This doesn't take as long as it sounds because the movie only lasts 77 minutes.
The plot is wildly all over the place but essentially involves Kitten, playing a character named "Chastity" (pause for long laughter) becoming the "Double-D Avenger" after receiving superhuman strength subsequent to licking the "crockazilla fruit" (you won't believe this part) as part of a medical procedure. Chastity tries to avenge her boyfriend's death and in the process gets to battle three other washed up dancers Haji, Mimma Mariucci, and Sheri Dawn Thomas and their boss, "Al Purplewood." (Technically, I guess Sheri Dawn Thomas isn't washed up, as any of the other dancers are old enough to be her grandmother.)
Along the way we see action, comedy, silly sound and special effects, and the least talented dancing ever recorded on film. Without question my favorite part of the film is a little sequence that Joe Bob refers to as "Teutonic feminist techno-performance art scene, with chicken effects." This may be the unintentionally funniest scene in movie history. I must have gone back ten times to watch it over. I won't describe it (honestly, I can't) but trust me: it will be the highlight of your week. It actually made Diet Coke spew out of my nose.
Although the movie is one big adolescent joke, it is amazing in that there is essentially no nudity in it. The movie is much funnier with Joe Bob's commentary on, but your do owe it to yourself to watch it "straight" once before cheating with the commentary, if for no other reason than to clearly hear Raven de la Croix snort like a pig. I highly recommend this film for all lovers of grade-Z cinematic gruel, just make sure you buy the Joe Bob enabled version, which comes in a handy two pack also including the deliciously awful "Jesse James Meets Frankenstein's Daughter", and costs about the same as the original DVD of "The Double-D Avenger" by itself!
Scott A. Misko | STONE MOUNTAIN, GEORGIA USA | 05/26/2004
(4 out of 5 stars)
"This movie is pure corn in that it takes every opportunity to include every bad joke about women's ta-tas. But on a late evening after a hard day, it's enough. Yep, sometimes we need to view cheesy bad movie to appreciate the times that we can view high quality films. This movies does a great job. Big breasted women exploited for all they are worth with low budget laughs. Satisfied my craving for pure slock."
Double D avenger
R. Jackson | BARTOW, FL USA | 05/14/2008
(2 out of 5 stars)
"Product contained a lot of fully dressed UGLY women. Should be rated no higher than PG 13, and that for the one (out of focus)boob shot. Service was excellent, product was a waste of time and money."