Search - Dark Harvest 2 on DVD

K. K. (GAMER)
Reviewed on 9/30/2022...

A must for lovers of Campy and Amateur style horror films!

This movie made me hate corn.

T. B. Kemp | Birmingham, AL USA | 01/14/2006

(1 out of 5 stars)

"Dear God, when will I ever learn? I love no-budget horror movies but you have to draw the line somewhere. Dark Harvest 2 is somewhere behind that line, hidden by other gems like, well, every movie ever released by The Asylum. As far as a review I can't say much that hasn't already been said. The director's attempts at "establishing" a scene are enough to make Gandhi come back to life and immediately kill himself. Here's a hint to the director -- the sound of a little girl screaming is in the Top 5 of Most Annoying Things Ever so to stick a camera on a 9-year old girl and tell her to scream for 5 minutes is a crime against nature, no matter how many camera angles you use. And how can a psychic look at a footprint in the mud and have a psychic premonition OF A FOOTPRINT IN THE MUD??!?!?! What the hell does that even mean? For the love of God, just stop it. I hope you don't get any ideas about making another movie like "Wheat: Legend of the Cereal Killer." I know that was corny but what do you expect, the ENTIRE movie takes place in a freakin' cornfield."

A- MAIZE-ingly Bad!

Ghoulie Guru | 12/28/2005

(1 out of 5 stars)

"Well, shuck me sideways. I haven't seen a home movie this bad since the abysmal 13 SECONDS or HALF CASTE. Someone should take away this guy's Sony Handycam! This movie proves that just because you can make a movie on your camcorder for $20, doesn't necessarily mean you should.

I remember that one of the things that Robert Rodriguez wrote in his book, "Rebel Without a Crew" was that when you set out to make a no budget feature, you have to use whatever assets you have at your disposal. Rodriguez says that you should take an inventory of all the locations and props that you can beg, steal and borrow from your friends. Robert Rodriquez was friends with the Mayor of some town in Mexico, so the Mayor let him shoot all over for free. What you got in EL MARIACHI was a movie that looked like it cost much more than the actual budget.

I'm sure that the director of this movie has a copy of that book, and he took that advice to heart. In this case, he was apparently friends with a guy who owned a cornfield where they put on a haunted house every year. Seems like a pretty good location for a scary movie, but it's hard to keep a cornfield interesting for 90 minutes. Not a single installment of the CHILDREN OF THE CORN series spent more than a few minutes in the cornfield. Hitchcock only spent about ten minutes in one in NORTH BY NORTHWEST. Take a hint, fella... cornfields don't make for riveting cinema. It would have been good if the director would have had more friends with more locations, because this thing gets pretty tedious after the first 15 minutes. This movie looks like it cost about $30. (or whatever it cost in admission to the cornfield maze).

Apparently he couldn't even find anyone to act in his movie, so he cast himself. Big mistake. Here's a thought, if you really want to make a movie, get an actor. So, as far as assets go, it seems like the cornfield maze is the only thing the poor guy had. Maybe he thought that was enough. In fact, I'm going to go out on a limb and say that I KNOW he thought that was enough because the movie, before it captured the coveted honor of being the sequel to DARK HARVEST, was called simply THE MAIZE: THE MOVIE. Maybe this he's already planning THE MAIZE: THE MUSICAL or even THE MAIZE: THE MINI-SERIES.

Our Jack-Of-All-Trades (and yes, the Master of Nothing part of that saying is definitely appropriate here) plays a psychic dad who can tell when bad things are going to happen. Think of the character from the DEAD ZONE, but not anywhere near as good an actor as Christopher Walken or even Anthony Michael Hall. Psychic Dad has a premonition that his two daughers, who are at the corn maze with mom, are going to be killed. He rushes to save them. From that point on, the whole movie is spent watching Pyschic Dad run around in a cornfield, looking for his two daughters. He finds the two little girl ghosts from THE SHINING, and he helps solve the mystery of their murder.

Shot on a $200 Handycam. The director cast himself. Edited on iMovie. Improvised story. If that's not enough to keep you away from this a-maize-ingly corny catastrophy, consider this as a final warning... The WHOLE MOVIE takes place in a cornfield, boils and ghouls. Here's Ghoulie Guru's tip on how to save some money and still feel like you've seen this movie. Next time you see a cornfield, stop the car. Take a flashlight and go run around in there for like 90 minutes.
"

I hope Cowell reads this.

Joel A. Caballero | California, US | 11/26/2005

(1 out of 5 stars)

"I was actually thinking about writing Mr. Cowell a letter but this will have to do. If there was an award for worst movie ever written, this one would win hands down. I laughed through all of it. It looks to me as though you were given a camcorder for your birthday and you decided to make a movie. A low budget is no excuss for something this bad. I don't just blame you, your editor needs to take a little more time figuring when to stop showing so much corn.

Don't even compare this movie to the Blair Witch project. That one had something going for it. I can see you spent more money on the cover of the DVD then in the making of the film. I think it's sleezy what you did, "Trying to hop on the back of what-ever success Harvest Moon 1 made." and showing a scare-crow on the cover and having no such thing in the actual movie.

I'd be ashamed to be apart of that movie."