Subject: I have found a DVD that I think you would enjoy
Actors: Walter Baziac, Kerol Rae, Jack Rooney, Steve Russell, Ron Blackstone
Director: Tom Barker
Genres: Mystery & Suspense
Similarly Requested DVDs
An unintentional comedy classic
Leeandra Nolting | New Orleans, LA | 06/12/2007
(5 out of 5 stars)
"I first became aware of this movie during high school, when some friends of mine said "you have to see this movie that they made here in Greensburg." (Greensburg, Indiana, being our hometown of 10,000 people.)
Turns out that this was the only feature-length film directed by Tom Barker, father of my childhood friend Nikki Barker and of my younger brother's prom date Amanda Barker.
Ten things that are going so, so wrong in this movie but yet so, so right:
1. The plotline. Basically, this revolves around drug-smuggling and crop-dusting. Because those little planes that spray pesticide on Hoosier soybean fields have gas tanks big enough to make flights to Hondouras without refueling 2,000 times along the way.
2. The acting. Pretty much everyone in this is either a stuntman or a porn actor/actress in real life, and has the serious acting chops that would be expected from them. Apparently, no one told the one woman in this that this WASN'T a porno, so she delivers all of her lines as though it were. (Leading to the single greatest innuendo in movie history, "Why? Do you need your...crops...dusted...?")
3. The characters. There is a hitman named Brass Bauls. The femme fatale is a 35-if-she's-a-day "Hondouran exchange student" named Renee Dubois (apparently, they speak French and not Spanish in Hondouras now) who is here in the States to "learn about the cropdusting." She moonlights as a waitress. Apparently green cards are easy to come by in Greentown.
4. The hair. Mullets. ZZ Top beards. Gay moustaches on ostensibly straight characters. And "Renee Dubois" has the largest bleached, teased, and sprayed coiffure I've ever seen.
5. The cinematography. A good 25% of the screen time is devoted to characters getting in and out of their cars. Also, driving said cars around the same curve on County Road NE 80 over and over again. There are lots of pointless, nauseating, out-of-focus aerial shots of cropdusters at work. A chase scene appears to have been filmed with a handheld camera by a man standing in the back of a pickup that's doing 30 mph down a gravel road. Then the footage was sped up.
6. The continuity. For a film in which CROPDUSTING plays a major role, they didn't pay much attention to the state of the crops. The fields are fallow, then the corn is tasseling, then it is knee-high, then it is ready for harvest. All in a movie that's supposed to take place over the course of a week.
7. The sex scene. My brother and I are 99% sure that this was filmed in the director's living room. We both recognized the wood paneling and Mrs. Barker's wall hangings.
8. The soundtrack. Think bad porno. Played on a Casio.
9. The special effects and pointless destruction. A car gets crushed for implausible reasons by a backhoe. Also, because every cop movie of the 80s and early 90s MUST end with a giant fireball, they blow up a chicken coop.
10. The ending credits. The Ladies Auxillary of the St. Paul, Indiana, Volunteer Fire Department provided the Craft Services.
And there is much, much more. This DVD is worth every penny that I paid for it...which, come to think of it, one penny is EXACTLY how much I paid for it here on Amazon."