Pitcher jack cooper is in a major bind when he makes it to the minor leagues and gets stage fright on the mound. Jacks new teammate and roommate is ed a chimpanzee who turn out to be a born baseball player a bona fide matc... more »hmaker and the best buddy jack ever had. Studio: Uni Dist Corp. (mca) Release Date: 08/24/2004 Starring: Jayne Brook Matt Leblanc Run time: 94 minutes Rating: Pg Director: Bill Couturie« less
""Ed" is beyond bad: it is well into the realm of legend. You might not have expected that a well-funded Hollywood production could be so wretched,but you will become convinced once you have seen it. LeBlanc plays "Deuce," a country bumpkin turned minor league baseball player. The back story is well established with LeBlanc on his farm milking cows and refusing to eat ham that came from his favorite pig. He wears a John Deere cap (I honestly hope John Deere didn't actually pay for this ill-conceived product placement) to further establish the character. The cap makes LeBlanc look as much like a farmer as a tutu would make Marlon Brando look like a ballerina.
Deuce gets signed by a minor league club, the Rockets, and is quickly assigned to live with the new mascot and third baseman, Ed Sullivan, a chimpanzee. Needless to say, Ed is hilarious (in theory) and gets into all sorts of wacky situations. Most of the situations are at the comedic level of the Three Stooges (if they had lobotomies) and feature such antics as forced toupee removal, making Deuce eat dog food, and lots and lots of flatus. Not only is the humor of gluteal crepitation repeatedly highlighted, but other bathroom-related issues regularly emerge. Thank goodness Ed knows how to use deodorizer spray!
Ed initially is a mascot, but longs to play ball. After an official rules that "there's no rule requiring a player to be a Homo sapiens" Ed becomes the third baseman. Needless to say, this can't go without plot thickening, and after Ed is traded by the idiot toupee-wearing owner's son, there are multiple monkeynappings and chimp electrocutions. Along the way, there's a dreadful romance subplot, as Ed and an annoying child actress teach Deuce about love and life. Also be sure not to miss a special guest appearance by Tommy Lasorda, and a tearjerker of a hospital scene after Ed nearly freezes to death in a banana truck. (Don't ask.) Fortunately for the cast, all ends well, though viewers may be emotionally scarred for life. Actually viewers are unlikely to recall much about the film inasmuch as the desire to sleep is nearly overpowering after the first ten minutes or so.
The film did leave me with a couple of questions, aside from the obvious one, "Who thought this was a good enough idea to fund?" The single question I am most curious about is why is Matt LeBlanc orange? I mean really, really orange. It's like he only ate carrots for a month before making the film, or perhaps used some kind of beta carotene face paint. Why would the director or makeup artists want him to look that way?
The film features the much more talented Zach Ward (billed as "Zacharias Ward" and of "Titus" fame) as a supporting player. There were a few other genuinely talented actors present in the credits, although I'm sure they have grave retrospective reservations about their roles in this mess.
The DVD also comes with a dreadful black and white short titled "Perfect Control," which features Babe Ruth teaching school kids how to play baseball, and an unseemly appearance by the algebra teacher. You'll have to watch it to see how bad it is: better yet, don't watch it, or, for that matter, "Ed" either.
This is a film with the power to make a sports fan hate baseball for life. I recommend staying far away from this cinematic travesty at all costs."
Too bad monkeys *didn't* make this movie...
Staci L. Wilson | USA | 01/29/2005
(1 out of 5 stars)
"Jack "Deuce" Cooper (Matt LeBlanc) is a minor league baseball pitcher who's got the goods, but no self-confidence. Instead of looking up Dr. Phil, the team manager decides that a simian teammate is just what strike-out Deuce needs for a boost. Enter Ed, a chimp who's got more talent in his elongated little finger than the whole team put together. Ed's antics, including scarfing down chocolate-covered bananas and pulling toupees off of bald heads, were all "aped" by men in monkey suits and animatronics. Unfunny slapstick makes this DVD a real strike-out.
Staci Layne Wilson
"
THE WORST MOVIE EVER CONCIEVED
Staci L. Wilson | 08/06/1999
(1 out of 5 stars)
"horrid a true waste of one and a half hours of life life"
Annoying, Kiddie, The worst movie I've ever seen!
Staci L. Wilson | 05/14/1999
(1 out of 5 stars)
"Everything about Ed is terrible! The sound fx are worse than a low cost skit show. King Kong looks more realistic than Ed. It is SO obvious he's a robot! Ed also has a weak, flimsy plot."
What were they thinking??????????
Graboidz | Westminster, Maryland | 04/15/2008
(1 out of 5 stars)
"First of all, I have to wonder what Courtney Cox, David Schwimmer and the rest of the "Friends" cast said to Matt LeBlanc when this stinker hit the big screen. This puppy came out right in the middle of the whole Must-See-TV heyday. If any of them gave praise to this film, and were believable....then they all deserved Emmys! There is truly nothing enjoyable about "Ed". I love a good goofy "monkey" movie. I grew up watching "Tarzan" flicks, just so I could see Cheetah make some goofy faces every now and again. Today, my kids and I chuckle at stuff like "MVP: Most Valuable Primate" or "Lancelot Link, Secret Chimp". I guess the key ingredient is that most successful monkey movies, actually feature a real monkey..not some person in a monkey suit. And not a monkey who somehow is over 5 feet tall in some shots. Monkeys are fun and funny to watch....people in monkey costumes are just embarassing! Now this may sound like I'm slamming the movie, but I actually recommend you see this stink-fest. There should be college courses dedicated to "Ed" in film school detailing just HOW NOT TO MAKE A MOVIE. You will be amazed at just how awful this film is. You have to truly see it to appreciate it's awfulness. I can now sit through "Battlefield Earth", "Ishtar", "Waterworld" and any other bad movie you wanna throw my way because I've now seen the worst Hollywood has to offer...I've seen "Ed"."