Subject: I have found a DVD that I think you would enjoy
Actors: William Forsythe, Hunter Tylo, Jeffrey Combs, Elise Muller, Arthur Roberts (II)
When a brilliant but misguided scientist is banished to a remote island his stem cell research and DNA manipulation give birth to horrifying results. By combining the most vicious killer of the oceans with the intelligence... more »
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Bad concept, worse execution.
See about me | North | 03/13/2006
(1 out of 5 stars)
"Hammerhead is a movie about a half-man half-shark. Just click "x."
Still with me? Good. In Hammerhead, and evil doctor whose name I forgot invites a bunch of random people to his evil laboratory. (I'll refer to him as "Dr. Alberfesto" from this point, since that's probably his name anyway.) Maybe they got golden tickets, or perhaps Dr. Alberfesto sent a blood-stained invitation via red-eyed skeleton vulture, I can't really remember. Dr. Alberfesto invited these people to show them a scientific breakthrough of his. That being, he genetically combined his son who had cancer with a shark, as to cure him of his illness. (Makes perfect sense.) "You're mad!" one of the random main characters gasped. Dr. Alberfesto, feeling that his sanity was possibly in question, excused himself from the room. ...And activated a button that released the tank containing his mutant son. Dr. Alberfesto, like all great villains, rested comfortably with the knowledge his visitors were dead.
However, in an astute display of competence, one of Dr. Alberfeso's guards dropped an assault rifle in the room before leaving, for no apparent reason. The shark monster was unleashed, sometimes appearing in its rubber glory for a full nanosecond before the ADD-afflicted cameraman veered into some brick wall. Apparently this movie takes place in an alternate dimension where gunpowder works when it gets wet, because one of the random main characters dived under, grabbed the rifle, and fired off a few shots. After this clumsy exchange, out heroes noticed a convenient ladder leading out of the room. In a shocking twist, Dr. Alberfesto was in fact watching this on his evil-cam with his fingers connected, perhaps twirling his mustache. He revealed in one of the most asinine plot devices ever, that his shark-son hunting the main characters would awaken a more docile and human psyche in him for some reason.
The next few scenes were feral and visceral observations of human desperation, prodding your innermost fears with lines like: "These shoes are ruined." The next hour or so shows our heroes vacantly wandering around in a forest, sometimes getting eaten by the mutant shark or getting poison ivy, and sometimes engaging in firefights choreographed by Malaysian slaves. At the end of the movie, all but two characters are dead. They are captured and taken back to Dr. Alberfesto's invariably evil laboratory.
Our female lead woke up upside-down on a contraption that lowered into a tank of water containing the mutant shark. The evil scientist explained that he planned on his mutant shark son mating with her. Maybe this isn't painfully stupid, and the director was trying to satisfy an underplayed fetish of some sort. Anyway... I'm not complaining about a lack of gratuitous nudity, but apparently sharks now know how to remove articles of clothing. Sharks are vicious, but I can't imagine even them easily impregnating someone through a pair of panties. The other main character totally unexpectedly charged in Rambo-style, spraying the mutant shark with liquid nitrogen until he exploded. Somehow. Some other stuff happens and fin.
Explaining this movie was like watching it twice, which may require therapy. It wasn't offensively stupid on all levels, which is why it sucked so immensely. It was like the director wasn't expecting Hammerhead to be bad, so he made sure it took itself seriously; crafting one of the most dull, corny, and unintentionally pretentious insomnia-remedies in quite some time.
- Thus says the Pellington"
Joshua Koppel | Chicago, IL United States | 01/29/2006
(3 out of 5 stars)
"One reviewer claimed this was a typical sharkman movie. I don't think there have been enough sharkman movies to define a typical, but it does fit the mad scientist mode that was so popular for so long.
Jeffrey Combs is a disgruntled scientist with an axe to grind. He has retreated to an island where he has set up a small empire complete with army (funny how discredited scientist always seem to have huge fortunes). There he has crossed a man with a hammerhead shark and is trying to enhance the human elements as well as breed a new race of man. Unfortunately the creature seems to prefer eating women to mating with them and Combs never seems to hit on the idea of artificial insemination.
A corporate science team has arrived to view Combs's stem cell research but they quickly learn the truth behind their invitation. The island is full of all sorts of crossbreeds, particularly carnivorous plants and all of the corporate scientists seem top act like ex-commandos.
I expected a slightly different ending or cliffhanger that never materialized and there were plot paths that were never explored or exploited. Plus we never get a clear view of the creature so the special effects folks never had to figure out hoe to make it move realistically. This is fence-sitting film that has elements to make it good as well as bad."
Predictable, but enjoyable
Mojo Jojo | 12/28/2005
(3 out of 5 stars)
"This is not a great movie. Nor is it even a very good movie. But it's not terrible, and in the genre of B monster films it gets the job done. And unlike a lot of these films, it's not boring.
The premise of a sharkman hunting down a group of victims as they struggle to escape an island ruled by a madman is nothing special. The acting is decent. The script has a few holes here and there, but they're generally small and easy to overlook. I actually liked some of the characters, and though I wouldn't probably watch it again, it's worth seeing once as long as the expectations aren't too high.
The biggest weakness of the film is in the special effects. The sharkman actually looks pretty good, but the death scenes are largely shots of people being "edited" to death. In other words, there's a shot of the sharkman coming at the camera, followed by a shot of a screaming victim, followed by a shot of blood. But hey, it's still a fair job for a small film.
Will you love it? Probably not. Will you feel you wasted an hour and a half of your life watching it? Yes. But let's be honest, you probably would've wasted that time anyway. So why not enjoy an okay movie while you're at it?"